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Posted by mm on February 27, 2008, 2:01 pm
On Wed, 27 Feb 2008 07:32:00 -0800, Smitty Two
>I was in email contact with an agent recently, and decided that she was
>not responsive enough to my needs, so I informed her I would look
>elsewhere. That seemed acceptable to her at first, but after a couple of
>days of chewing on it, she apparently went off the deep end,
>constructing a vicious written attack that I would characterize as rabid
>or psychotic.
She wrote this letter only to you? If so, forget about it, or write
her a letter in return. You don't have to use profanity, vulgarity,
or scatology to write a strong letter, and I would advice against all
of those. But it wouldn't hurt to write her a letter. One thing you
could say is, "Now I'm certain I made the right choice in ending our
relationship. You are not a person I want to deal with regarding real
estate."
When I was buying, I had a real estate agent for two half days, who
showed me houses that were selling for 25% more than I said I wanted
to spend.
When I bought one, the two women representing the seller still did a
terrible job regarding me, in ways that didn't benefit the seller. A
couple months after I moved it, I had time to make an appointment with
them and I told them what they had done wrong, and that someone my age
would know loads of people who were buying or selling houses, and I
woudn't recommend them to anyone. I don't know if this bothered them
or not, but the whole office they worked for went out of business
within a couple years, and I never saw their pictures in the real
estate ads, as is common in one of the local magazines.
You might arrange a meeting to tell her off, so you could watch her
reaction, rather than just a letter. But she probably won't react
much. The two I talked to had not much to say in return, but maybe
they didn't make the same mistakes the next time.
If she sent a copy to someone else, and harmed you in some way, please
give more details.
>
>I have written to the owner and manager of the Century 21 franchise for
>whom she works, but since she's a top seller for him, I'm not holding my
>breath that he'll concern himself too much with my complaint.
>
>So do any of you happen to know whether there is a procedure for formal
>redress of grievances against agents? Are they sworn to uphold some sort
>of code of ethics? Does Century 21 censure its agents if they misbehave,
>or are individual franchises free to operate however they choose?
Sticks and stones can break your bones, but words addressed only to
you can't hurt you. What is it that happened that has you so
outrages?
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Posted by Smitty Two on February 28, 2008, 2:36 am
>
> She wrote this letter only to you? If so, forget about it,
Yes, to me, although she cc'd my g.f. and promised to send a copy to
the gentleman who referred me to her. (a promise that did not
materialize, but the gentleman was horrified when my g.f. showed the
letter to him later)
>
>
> If she sent a copy to someone else, and harmed you in some way, please
> give more details.
> >
>
> Sticks and stones can break your bones, but words addressed only to
> you can't hurt you. What is it that happened that has you so
> outrages?
That is a very thoughtful question, and one I have deliberated on a bit
already. More will no doubt be revealed. But, I will tell you that the
letter was outrageous, (so why would I not be outraged?) and 100%
unprovoked. If I had an employee who spoke to one of my customers like
that, I would fire the employee on the spot. Our society has grown rude,
and we have grown accepting of rudeness. I guess I'd like to rail
against that, effectively or not.
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Posted by Banty on February 28, 2008, 7:40 am
Smitty Two says...
>
>
>
>>
>> She wrote this letter only to you? If so, forget about it,
>
>Yes, to me, although she cc'd my g.f. and promised to send a copy to
>the gentleman who referred me to her. (a promise that did not
>materialize, but the gentleman was horrified when my g.f. showed the
>letter to him later)
>
>>
>
>>
>> If she sent a copy to someone else, and harmed you in some way, please
>> give more details.
>> >
>
>>
>> Sticks and stones can break your bones, but words addressed only to
>> you can't hurt you. What is it that happened that has you so
>> outrages?
>
>That is a very thoughtful question, and one I have deliberated on a bit
>already. More will no doubt be revealed. But, I will tell you that the
>letter was outrageous, (so why would I not be outraged?) and 100%
>unprovoked. If I had an employee who spoke to one of my customers like
>that, I would fire the employee on the spot. Our society has grown rude,
>and we have grown accepting of rudeness. I guess I'd like to rail
>against that, effectively or not.
I wouldn't see this as an ethical question so much as your unfortunately haVING
run into an emotionally unstable, unhappy person. She didnt' set you up to lose
money or otherwise manipulate you, or others, to get something for herself, did
she? That would be more along the lines of what people consider ethical
questions.
From your description, this is beyond rudeness, so beyond your wisest course is
to realize that, and don't let her emotional problems affect your life further.
Which means to drop it. After bring the letters to the attention of any
superiors she may have. And thereafter don't use that realtor or any associated
realtor.
Is there something in the letters that's defamatory to you? (If so, are you
telling us everything?)
Banty
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Posted by on February 28, 2008, 9:40 am
,
> Smitty Two says...
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> >> She wrote this letter only to you? =A0If so, forget about it,
>
> >Yes, to me, =A0although she cc'd my g.f. and promised to send a copy to
> >the gentleman who referred me to her. (a promise that did not
> >materialize, but the gentleman was horrified when my g.f. showed the
> >letter to him later)
>
> >> If she sent a copy to someone else, and harmed you in some way, please
> >> give more details.
>
> >> Sticks and stones can break your bones, but words addressed only to
> >> you can't hurt you. =A0What is it that happened that has you so
> >> outrages?
>
> >That is a very thoughtful question, and one I have deliberated on a bit
> >already. More will no doubt be revealed. But, I will tell you that the
> >letter was outrageous, (so why would I not be outraged?) and 100%
> >unprovoked. If I had an employee who spoke to one of my customers like
> >that, I would fire the employee on the spot. Our society has grown rude,
> >and we have grown accepting of rudeness. I guess I'd like to rail
> >against that, effectively or not.
>
> I wouldn't see this as an ethical question so much as your unfortunately h=
aVING
> run into an emotionally unstable, unhappy person. =A0She didnt' set you up=
to lose
> money or otherwise manipulate you, or others, to get something for herself=
, did
> she? =A0That would be more along the lines of what people consider ethical=
> questions.
>
> From your description, this is beyond rudeness, so beyond your wisest cour=
se is
> to realize that, and don't let her emotional problems affect your life fur=
ther.
> Which means to drop it. =A0After bring the letters to the attention of any=
> superiors she may have. =A0And thereafter don't use that realtor or any as=
sociated
> realtor.
>
> Is there something in the letters that's defamatory to you? =A0(If so, are=
you
> telling us everything?)
>
> Banty- Hide quoted text -
>
> - Show quoted text -
I agreee with Banty. State licensing boards have plenty of more
important things to worry about than someone who simply wrote a nasty
letter to someone that was a potential client. Had that letter been
to someone that was part of an actual transaction and caused potential
harm, then that would be a very different scenario. ST has already
written a letter to her employer. I'd forget about it.
It's also a bit curious that we aren't given any of the details of
exactly what transpired and what was actually said. There can be two
sides to a story.
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Posted by mm on February 28, 2008, 9:41 am
>Smitty Two says...
>>
>>
>>
>>>
>>> She wrote this letter only to you? If so, forget about it,
>>
>>Yes, to me, although she cc'd my g.f. and promised to send a copy to
>>the gentleman who referred me to her. (a promise that did not
>>materialize, but the gentleman was horrified when my g.f. showed the
>>letter to him later)
>>
>>>
>>
>>>
>>> If she sent a copy to someone else, and harmed you in some way, please
>>> give more details.
>>> >
>>
>>>
>>> Sticks and stones can break your bones, but words addressed only to
>>> you can't hurt you. What is it that happened that has you so
>>> outrages?
>>
>>That is a very thoughtful question, and one I have deliberated on a bit
>>already. More will no doubt be revealed. But, I will tell you that the
>>letter was outrageous, (so why would I not be outraged?) and 100%
>>unprovoked. If I had an employee who spoke to one of my customers like
>>that, I would fire the employee on the spot. Our society has grown rude,
>>and we have grown accepting of rudeness. I guess I'd like to rail
>>against that, effectively or not.
>
>I wouldn't see this as an ethical question so much as your unfortunately haVING
>run into an emotionally unstable, unhappy person. She didnt' set you up to lose
>money or otherwise manipulate you, or others, to get something for herself, did
>she? That would be more along the lines of what people consider ethical
>questions.
I didn't think of this question in my previous post (which in most
newsreaders will actually follow this one)
If she just insulted him for things that were known to his gf, that's
not as bad. If she disclosed personal information that Smitty-2 might
have said to the agent when the gf wasn't around, that's unethical in
the bigger sense of the word. I don't know what code of ethics real
estate agents are required or supposed to subscribe to, or what rules
the various legistlatures and regulatory agencies and employers impose
on agents. But the fact, as I see it, that it is unethical to repeat
personal information about someone is reason enough to complain to the
boss. It still reflects on the boss's business, it still alienates
current and potential clients. And so maybe the boss should know.
In judging this, I don't think it matters if the g.f. already knew
what the letter contained or not, because I'm talking about info that
the agent didn't know the g.f. knew. I'm including everything, but
what might be particularly harmful is if Smitty had said, I want 3
bedrroms because I want to have two children. Because he might have
told his gf that he didn't want to have any children. He could have
been saying this because the gf wanted children, and he wanted her not
to want to marry him, or because he wanted her to want to marry him
for him alone, and not because he could give her children. (a bad
plan btw because she might come to terms with not having children, and
then not want them at all even though Smitty was planning on
surprising her with his wishes after they got engaged.) Or he might
want the other two bedrooms one for an office and one for growing pot,
but not want to tell the agent that.
Or if he had said how much money he could afford to spend on a house,
or how much money he made each year. She shoudln't be relating
anything he said that the gf might not know in a letter she sends to
the gf. That seems to violate professional ethics.
Anything else negative the agent had to say, including baseless
insults, might not be a violation of professional ethics and "ethics"
might be seen to be more narrow than proper behaviour in gnereal, but
it's a violation of one or both to send the letter to someone other
than Smitty.
>
>From your description, this is beyond rudeness, so beyond your wisest course is
>to realize that, and don't let her emotional problems affect your life further.
>Which means to drop it. After bring the letters to the attention of any
>superiors she may have. And thereafter don't use that realtor or any associated
>realtor.
>
>Is there something in the letters that's defamatory to you? (If so, are you
>telling us everything?)
>
>Banty
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